Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Early morning parade - people I see almost every day

I've always wanted to make this list of fellow regulars at the Joggers Park. I do not know any of their names. Here goes:

Elephant Lady
Peaceful (and mildly frowning) senior citizen who walks anti-clockwise. Not elephant-like in size, but she wears a floppy gray colored track suit.

Elegant slim female runner, likely in her mid-20s, who has a medium-speed shuffling gait. 

Captain Gamsakhurdia
Purposeful looking speedwalking senior gentleman in shorts. Is considerate of lane etiquette - always steps to the side when runners pass.

Colonel  Rahmanzadeh
Looks like a 60ish Iranian armyman on furlough. Anti-clockwise brisk mover - walks with a jacket and shorts on. No gun seen.

(Or local corporator) Middle of lane walker who swings his arms wide inconsiderately. Always accompanied by at least one chatting flunkey. Seems to inspect the park often for maintenance, and knows all the staff.

Pol's Flunkey(s)
Up to 3 walkers that are seen with the politician all the time. One of them looks 100% PMC staff like, and has this unique walk-speed jog at times. Moves at the same speed as the rest, only that he has this jogging action.The flunkeys usually end their time at the park with a loud chortling session seated by the pol.

Florida Pensioner
Slow moving old gent who makes others behind him guess which way he'll veer, from the middle of the track.

30ish runner in a red hat who will always try to speed up and take the lead, when someone tries to pass him. Usually does not succeed.

Kindly Old Lady
The one I mentioned here back in March. Walking conversationalist, and friends with a group of always seated chatty ladies that talk about their families and inflation.

The 3 Idiots
Insufferable group of vocal codgers who have one trait in common. The ability to always get in the way of anyone that passes them. This is done by ambling 3 across in the walking lane, and 1 in the narrower running lane, with frequent sudden switches in position. And by being oblivious to how they annoy everyone. They start with one meandering senior, and in minutes the group expands to 3, led by the Chief Idiot who can actually straddle both lanes at the same time.

Group typical I'm sure, of many other similar places. Other park users now plan their walk/run schedules so they avoid this 3-5 man regiment.

Gold's Gym Instructor
Senior citizen who's somehow the exercise coach for other older gentlemen. Does contortions that some of them simply should not replicate, and he should not encourage to do.

Destination Restroom
Middle aged man who always walks around the park with a rolled up newspaper.

Tantric Yogi
Barefoot 40+ runner in a tee and pants, flails his arms wildly, and runs only anti-clockwise in the mud track. Wild hair. Inspects and picks flowers.

Dark woman who walks only in the shaded stretch even on moderately sunny mornings. There's another that whips out an umbrella in the non-shady section, early mornings.

Katherine Hepburn
Stately, tall old white lady with a slow gait, and an umbrella. The slowest mover in the park. Is wary of tripping or being knocked over by runners. Has two attendants - one that walks with or behind her, and another that gets her newspaper and a bottle of something. She's the only regular person of white extraction in the mornings.

Steam Engine
Unsteady and ungainly slow barely-jogger, who forces himself to get momentum with a series of violent forward movements. Uses the far slope to gain more speed afterward, with a flat footed thumping sound all the while. Stares at anyone that passes him, which means almost everyone.

(+couples/others who show up daily, but have no standout characteristics or behavior like those on this list)